Episode 079 – Being Elven

Elves in Shadowrun

In which Vox and Mr. Johnson talk with Russell Zimmerman about being an elf in Shadowrun . Also included: a new episode of Dear Handy, tons of listener emails, and a new storytime!

Show Notes:
SUET the Card Game Kickstarter:


Tavern Tales RPG Kickstarter:


10 thoughts on “Episode 079 – Being Elven”

  1. Gaaa! Again with this Candy Guy! First he says he can’t really give advice, but then he does. OK. Here’s my take. The first thing ya gotta do if you’re a Shadowrunner with any morals or at least standards is make it clear to your fixers and Johnsons what those are. Generally the first is what I call the Rainbowsmite Rule: No deliberately geekin’ women, kids, or the cuter animal types. The next is what I call the Winternight Rule: No ‘runs helping psychopaths end the world. Yeah it’s relative when you consider some of these corps. But it’s common sense to keep most people from declaring a crusade/jihad on you. They’re harder to buy off. It won’t get you as much employment and there’s no guarantees. But it’ll keep the inner drama queen brooding to a level mere whiskey can cope with. All in all, I wonder how they let this Shandy dude breed. Speaking of which, let me offer, despite my sharpness, congrats and a recommendation: STFU and kiss up to the Beaver shaman. Make her a chummer. That’s on dam you don’t wanna burn. You do and no good will come of it.

    1. No way, Eric – the Dear Brandy segments are brilliant. It’s an excellent sorting mechanism – idiots who shouldn’t be running will listen to them and, in short order, remove themselves from the shadows (and, well, possibly from life).

      I’d propose a modification of the Rainbowsmite rule: no deliberately geeking non-combatants. It doesn’t do you any good – brings added heat, gets more people gunning for you – and makes it way more likely that people are going to refuse to work with you in the future.

      And yes, all runners should pay attention to the Winternight rule. Getting paid the big bucks to end the world doesn’t do you any good – if you succeed, you don’t have anywhere to *spend* those big bucks. The corps are awful but they at least recognize that ending the world (deliberately) is a bad plan – how do you squeeze money out of something that’s not there anymore?

  2. Recently in one of my first shadowrun sessions we ended up having to kidnap a child and hand it over to parts unknown. This is striking a nerve with my runner (Helix) who was abducted as a child to be experimented on.

    Despite the child being a real brat. Helix is a professional and will complete his job. But after struggling with this he is currently planning on leaving his contact info with the he kid should she need to ‘hire’ him to extract her.

    Situation and be resolved tuesday….

  3. Here is a comment on the graphic. Didn’t Mr. Johnson make a comment on elf ear size a few episodes ago? Something about those ‘aren’t’ elf ears of the SR universe? Or is that an example of really bad elf posers again? lol

    1. Ha! You make a good point. It was the simplest silhouette I could find of an elf that wasn’t a Christmas elf and wasn’t a fancy wood elf. Call it an elf poser. 🙂

  4. As for the elves, it irritates there was no reference to the opportunistic Tir invasion of the California Free State. Or “The War of Tir (or Elven) Aggression” as my neighbors refer to it. The old USA is hardly in the grave and the state flooded with destitute refuges when the fraggin’ elves attack for no good reason. Elves may be darlings in LA (which we all hope will fall into the ocean), but in the rest of Cali that charisma doesn’t count for much. This is prime Humanis Policlub stomping grounds. Trolls, Orks, and Dwarves barely make it into the recruiting spiels; elven ear necklaces are still acceptable fashion accessories in some areas. Hefty contributions by ordinary people gives the Cali chapter outsized cred in humanis world. The animosity is such plenty allied themselves with the Japanese invaders, who’s motives were no better even if their penchant for wholesale destruction was not. One day there’ll be a reckoning for the Tir – and maybe the PCC too. But I fear if things don’t smooth out it’ll be way nastier than it needs to be.

    (And as an aside, Rusty should check source materials and be a little kinder in his lectures. It’s true “the noble savage” is a stereotype that goes way back in western literature and not a helpful one. But it has a basis in fact. Native Americans lived active lifestyles, in low population intensive environments, eating diets that were relatively healthy or at least protein rich. Furthermore they tended to expose unhealthy looking infants – which a lot of societies once did. Early Europeans, by contrast, came from urban or near destitute farm environments where poor sanitation,and uneven diets – like low protein – and substandard food quality were often the norm. Exercise was considered unhealthy except for necessary activities like horsemanship and fencing. Exposing unhealthy infants still occurred but the Church actively discouraged it. A long sea voyage in confining boat with even drekkier diets didn’t help. So it’s no wonder new European arrivals often marveled at length in letters, journals, and histories at the Native American’s robust physiques and health as individuals and as societies. Only later when the diseases Europeans brought – and sometimes deliberately spread – did Native American health decline. This, too, reinforced the stereotype.)

  5. Landsknecht,
    You make a good point. 😀

    As for the elven ears, perhaps a better image could be found. But then again, I’ve heard that some elves mod their ears larger out of racial pride. Or to hang more bangles off. Even I can’t launch a wall of text large enough to detail all the 6th World’s body mod trends. Perhaps the Arcology could do an ep on them.

  6. Really enjoyed the full blown sociology conversation about the semi-racist worship of indigenous peoples and elves. Especially the bs mythos building involved in the Tirs, elvenkind and the honest breakdown of the Ancients. Thanks for this episode.

  7. As far as racism goes, it’s an over used term – and unhelpful. Yes, racism’s a 6th World growth industry, but the real danger IMO is “mere” prejudice. That term doesn’t get a lot of press, doesn’t ring off scream sheets as well, and certainly doesn’t help any agendas. Yet the background thinking that some race is just somehow fundamentally “different” and distinct from one’s own (good bad or otherwise) is inherent to nearly EVERYONE. The real danger is not just that it’s a gateway drug to honest to god Humanis or Tir style racism with the right pressure and conditions. It’s that it motivates a lot of insidious public policy and attitudes over the long term. Unfortunately, slinging the word “racist” at the prejudiced (99.9% of the population) is akin to asking them “So, when did you stop abusing your children?” Cue defensiveness, pushback, rationalizations, and another delay for metahuman rights in that area.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *